Marvel Rivals Promises ‘Balanced Gameplay’—Then Adds a Literal Planet-Eating God
In a move that has left the gaming community in both awe and utter despair, developers of Marvel Rivals have reassured fans that their highly anticipated team-based shooter will feature “ meticulously balanced gameplay, ” mere seconds before unveiling a new playable character: Galactus, Devourer of Worlds.
The announcement, which was delivered during a live developer stream, promised that every hero and villain in the game would have “clear strengths and weaknesses” to ensure fair competition. Then, without skipping a beat, the stream cut to gameplay footage of Galactus vaporizing entire teams with a single, disinterested exhale.
“We worked really hard to make sure Marvel Rivals is a skill-based, competitive experience,” said lead game designer Josh Matthews, standing before a giant promotional banner that simply read "ALL HAIL GALACTUS." “Every hero is viable in their own way—whether you’re playing as Spider-Man, Black Panther, or a celestial god who physically susta...