Trump Names Mar-a-Lago Chef as Secretary of State: 'His Lasagna Has More Layers Than NATO
PALM BEACH, FL — In an unprecedented diplomatic shakeup, Mar-a-Lago's head chef Mario Bianchi was accidentally nominated as Secretary of State after President Donald Trump reportedly confused his catering renewal contract with cabinet nomination paperwork during what staffers described as "Executive Time dinner."
The confusion occurred when Trump, between bites of what he called "the best meatloaf in the history of meatloaves, maybe ever," signed several documents without reading them, a practice his staff describes as "completely normal." Upon realizing the mix-up, aides were too terrified to correct the error after Trump declared it "possibly the most perfect appointment of all time."
"Chef Bianchi has tremendous foreign policy experience," Trump declared during an impromptu press conference held in the Mar-a-Lago kitchen. "He makes Italian food, Chinese food, AND Mexican food. Name one other Secretary of State who kn...